Last night I had a dinner party for Julie, Dan and his darling sister, Holly.

You all know what Julie looks like but here is a photo of Dan and Holly.

I adore them both. I don’t know if you can tell but they’re the people from another land of which I spoke, Iowa or Indiana, one of the “I” states.

(I’d like to note here that I love and accept all people)

Most people that come to my house are well aware of my entertainment rules. Wait, not just mine, all civilization’s rules.

1. Lovely appetizers and cocktails. polite conversation;   40 to 45 minutes
2. Arrange yourselves at the table;  Shouldn’t take more than 3 to 5 minutes
3. Enjoy a lovely 3 course meal. Can occur in one hour if the chit chat is kept to a minimum.
   1. last night’s dinner was a lovely salad, chicken parmigiana with cheese and basil pasta, dessert of apple pie and ice cream.
   2. lovely beverages were served throughout.
4. Saying our good byes. Not more than 2 minutes.

Since Dan has entered our family I’ve loosened this up a bit because the goyim seem to have to pee just as everyone else is at the elevator and I’m nothing if not flexible.

I will say it hasn’t been easy but he’s conformed to our family quite nicely and not too long after I say “Go home” he pees and joins the others at the door.

Last night got us off to a bad start

They came 20 minutes late. This wasn’t too serious but I explained that they’d have to rush through dessert.

Then through no fault of my own my salad was so extraordinary that much time was used up praising it and asking for ingredients. (fyi strawberries).

I was sure that Dan schooled is sister on New York dining but he seems to have left out one major thing which can throw the whole meal off.

YOU ONLY TALK IN BETWEEN COURSES. The poor girl chatted between bites.

Which is why she unfortunately didn’t have time to finish her dessert.