Last night Liz and David came home from the weekend in Quogue.
I told them that david was leaving in a day or two.
At that news David said “Cocktails?”
Naturally I said yes but added “since he’s leaving, can we let dave come in?
David said “Don’t be an ass”
Liz said “If you want to invite him, do it”
I said to David “This isn’t setting anything up for the future, he’s leaving”
David said in a disgusted tone “let him come”
I went back to my house to tell dave he could join us. He was in his room skyping his girlfriend.
I returned to Liz and David’s knowing the crow I was going to have to eat.
David just shook his head and said “What are you drinking?”
The next morning I was clearer about my feelings. I was happy that he was leaving.
My sister said that since he’s been back he’s slowly been chipping away at my confidence and happiness.
I realize that it wasn’t entirely his fault. I was gradually slipping into the caretaker role that I’ve always had.
I knew that his leaving would put me back on track. I couldn’t wait.
When he woke up I asked him which day he was leaving, Wednesday or Thursday? He said he wasn’t sure.
I couldn’t understand it “why aren’t you?”
“It’s complicated” he smiled sheepishly
“A little of it has to do with the fact that I’m not fluent enough in Japanese and she’s not fluent enough in English to understand everything we say to each other”
“Man, lucky slut” I thought “If only I didn’t understand everything dave said maybe those long lectures on Al Qaeda or the history of salt during dinner would have been more bearable.”
When he got home later I asked him again when he was leaving.
He said “I was mistaken. I’m not leaving until the 16th.”
My heart fell. It was another 10 days. I really wanted him out of here.
My sister, Marcia reminded me that we were going to my niece Sadie’s Bat Mitzvah for the weekend and then it was only 5 days.
I was so looking forward to the weekend. We were all staying at the same hotel and it would be so much fun all being together
Not having to worry that dave would get fall down drunk was an added bonus.
This morning the maid is coming. He had not let her do the room he stayed in since he came back. It was getting dusty and depressing.
I told him I wanted him to let her do it today.
He said “Can’t I leave it for another week?”
I let it go for the time being and said
“So you’re definitely leaving next Friday?”
“I think so” he said.
“I have to tell you that I was very disappointed to hear that you weren’t leaving tomorrow.”
He looked surprised “You really want me totally out of your life, don’t you?”
“Yes.”
“But I have 50 years of my creative efforts in that closet. Where will I put it? Can I leave it here for a few years?”
He kept looking at the closet that had been turned into shelves that neatly held the music for all his albums and movies.”
“No dave, you can leave it here for awhile but once we are formally separated it has to go. I can pack it and put it in storage so it will be easily accessible to you. ”
I added
“I’ve been very kind to you. I’ve taken a lot of abuse for that from my friends and my family but I can’t be who I’m not”
Just last week when we took my nephew Evan up to college we had lunch with Stephanie and she was berating me for letting him be so comfortable. She said “You aren’t making him suffer at all”
Evan looked at her and said quietly “How does making him suffer help her?”
Out of the mouths of babes….
dave said “You have been more than kind. I know that and I’m so grateful”
“Well didn’t you think that your actions would eventually result in this? You made a choice. Did you think that you’d marry her and still keep one foot in the door here?” I asked
“I didn’t think that far” he looked sad.
I decided to get back to the reason I came in his room to begin with.
“Wouldn’t you be more comfortable if the room is clean and you have a made bed with clean sheets?” I looked at his bed. The quilt and sheets were in a ball half on the bed and half off.
“I don’t care about it. If I let her in the room I have to unpack my suitcase and put my things away. I just can’t deal with it yet.”
“dave I can’t stand looking at it. That’s why sometimes I come in and make your bed. Isn’t it more comfortable sleeping in it made?”
“I don’t care about the comfort but when I come in and see that you’ve made my bed, it makes me happy”
What a manipulative prick.
And here’s the sad part. I was pretty sure I’d be making his bed for the next week.