20 Have a nice life, or don’t


He asked me to go to the doctor with him. I guess he was afraid he couldn’t make it.

I don’t know if it was Cheryl being angry at me or what but I started yelling at him as soon as we got in the cab.

I was telling him how I didn’t do anything to deserve this. I was a wonderful wife, I took care of his family and brought them closer to us and I was truly a business partner. I hope she’s worth it.

He said, almost under his breath “So do I”

No matter what I said he kept agreeing with me. It isn’t easy to keep yelling at someone when they don’t argue back so I finally stopped. Not only because I wasn’t getting any satisfaction but I could see the cab driver scowling at me in the rear view mirror. I was sure he was thinking that if ever a woman needed her throat cut it was the infidel in the back seat flapping her ungrateful lips.

When we got to the doctor’s office we had about an hour to wait. While we were sitting there he brought up the boat. I’ve mentioned before how I feel about the boat.

For quite awhile he had been trying to talk me into keeping the boat as a mutual asset.

A few weeks ago he told me he wanted to put an electric anchor winch on the boat. He said it would add to the value when we sell it. I nixed it because as I told him then, I don’t care about the value of the boat because I don’t want any part of it.

At the time I thought he wanted the winch because he was getting older but I realized later that when he and I dealt with the anchor  he would steer the boat into the wind and I would pull up the anchor. He no longer had a strong jew as a first mate. Now he had a japanese flower. Obviously giving blow jobs won’t make your arms strong.

He brought this up again while we were waiting.

He suggested that we keep it and share the expenses (I should note that the expenses are enormous) but when we sell it in a few years we can share in the measly profit ( the ‘measly’ is mine)

I just looked at him like he was crazy and for the second time since this thing happened I started yelling at him.

“If you think I will pay one cent of the expenses for that boat so that you and your whore can sail around for three months out of the year you’re crazy. It will not happen.”

Luckily for dave the nurse, who had been trying hard not to hear , said the doctor was ready to see him.

I overheard him telling the doctor that he was depressed because he was getting a divorce and he couldn’t sleep so he was drinking to help him through it.

I couldn’t believe it when they came out and the doctor was giving him a prescription for sleeping pills so that he wouldn’t have to resort to drinking vodka to sleep.

The man had been sleeping for 3 days and nights straight and he had been drinking vodka for years . I didn’t say a word. First of all it was none of my business and second of all I would have sounded like a real shrew.

The next morning I was leaving for Washington DC and dave was leaving home for at least a month. I have no idea what his plans are after that.

I had to leave the house at 7 am. I was surprised to see dave awake when I got up. He said he couldn’t sleep. I asked about his sleeping pills. He hadn’t even filled the prescription. Even he knew what bullshit that was.

As I was leaving he came over to me and said “I’m almost afraid to say this to you”

I said “ Then don’t. Have a nice life” and I closed the door in his face.

11 thoughts on “20 Have a nice life, or don’t

  1. I thought about you this weekend with hope that it went ok. I hope now you can now start rebuilding your life. And no, you’re not a whining dope, not even close!!

  2. I second the “not-a-whiny-dope” assertion, wholeheartedly. Refreshing honesty, especially of the self-deprecating kind, managed with humor and verve is an amazing accomplishment all in itself. I’ve never heard of anything less whiny or dopey.

  3. I’m hooked, don’t want to stop reading….I have a long way to go to catch up to the present! Thanks for giving me this blog, even if just to look at the artwork 😉

  4. One minute I’m indignant and horrified and another minute I’m laughing out loud. Thank you for the honest blog, with humor and guts. You will get through this. I’m cheering for you.

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