421. Today’s lesson: Jews, snakes and guns

I just got an email from my niece, Stephanie. It said:

“I just pulled a snake out of my car. It was in my side pocket and I was putting my hand in there for a pen and felt it.     You should’ve heard my screams.”

That’s the second snake story that has occurred in my family recently. Remember the snakes in the towels at Marcia’s house?

What’s with all the snakes?  Jews don’t have snakes yet my people seem to be overrun with them. Is it some kind of sex thing?

David and his sons are in Texas watching the Texas Bluebirds play the Oklahoma Hot Dogs. I think that’s the name of those teams.

He keeps sending me and Liz pictures of Texans walking down the street in Dallas with machine guns hanging on their shoulders.

It seems that they are having some kind of demonstration because even though Texas is full of nuts they haven’t seen fit to allow those nuts to openly carry guns.

These people are marching to not have to keep their guns in their dungaree pockets or for the ladies, in their bras.

Think of all the time you waste if you have to reach into your clothing to get your gat. You’re just asking for a second thought or two so you  might not shoot someone for taking your parking spot. Yep cool heads are dead heads.

Naturally David jumped right in line with them and he brought his two innocent sons with him.

If those two weren’t almost thirty I’d fight for custody and I’d win.

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