429. Sometimes I spend time with people that drink their tea with one pinky up.

I had some high toned guests yesterday.

Carmon Deleone and his lovely wife, Kathy.

Now these are two people that when dave and I broke up I was afraid that I’d never see again, not only because Carmon has a snooty job, he is the musical director of the Cincinnati Ballet and the conductor of the Middletown Ohio Symphony, but he’s dave’s best friend in the world.

In fact I used to say that after me, Carmon was the person dave loved most in the world. I really know people.

The thought of losing those two and their wonderful daughters really made me sad so you can imagine how happy I was that I was going to see them. In fact they’re coming to stay with me in May too and I can’t wait. I do have a guest room you know.

Let me tell you about them and our history.

Before he was a big time conductor,  Carmon was a drummer at the Playboy Club and that’s when he met Kathy. She was a bunny supporting 3 little daughters, he played in the band.

You know how you don’t want to introduce an older friend as what they used to be because, well, we all age, but Kathy still looks like a Playboy Bunny. She’s still beautiful and joy and light enter the room with her. I personally think she should stop wearing the ears but you know me. I like to mind my own business.

I remember the first time I met Carmon. dave and I were engaged and we went to Cincinnati to visit. All over the airport were pictures of Carmon in tails.  You can imagine how I dreaded having to make conversation with this guy. Especially since I had heard that dave’s first wife thought Carmon was “difficult”.

Well he was wonderful and if he was fussy about exactly which Pepperidge Farm cookie he preferred I could live with that.

In fact it was almost a year before I found the right one. I’d serve him the cookies and each time he’d take a small bite, smile and say “very good but….” and he’d shake his head.

I was shocked to see that his preference turned out to be  Bordeaux, a relatively plain choice for such a fancy guy.

They live in this beautiful big house with giant white pillars in front.

Kathy not only takes care of this house all by herself she also paints it and spackles stuff while serving Carmy his snooty guy breakfasts that almost always include a white sauce.

She’s everything I always wished I was.

One of my favorite things she does is totally decorate her house for Christmas. Each year she makes a beautiful wreath for her front door and takes out all her decorations so she can bring the season into every room in the house.

One year after visiting them , loving the holiday feeling, even finding little reindeer in the guest towels, I promised myself I’d do the same thing when I got home.

I bought tiny blue lights and put them all around my living room and placed candy canes in all my plants.   I obviously shot my load on that effort because those decorations stayed up for 8 years until the last candy cane was eaten by somebody that didn’t consider freshness a prerequisite for enjoyment of sweets.

I knew then that I could never be like Kathy, I’d just have to enjoy her.

There’s another Carmon and Kathy story that I’ve always loved.

They were dating for several years when Carmon planned a trip to Europe and told Kathy to bring her divorce papers. She naturally assumed that Carmon was going to ask her to marry him and they’d do it on the trip.

Actually Carmon told us later that that was his intention but when he got there he just didn’t feel like doing it. Being Carmon, he also didn’t feel it was necessary to mention  his change of plans.

I keep imagining Kathy getting up each morning, hopefully putting on her wedding dress only to be disappointed. I pictured Kathy getting on the plane to go home wearing a frayed, dirty gown and holding wilted flowers.

Well Carmie and Kathy did get married and they lived happily ever after. In fact dave’s father performed the ceremony.

I’m so glad they’re still in my life. Not only because I love them and I do but because the Maestro said he’d fix my TV before going back to Cincinnati.

Life is good.

9 thoughts on “429. Sometimes I spend time with people that drink their tea with one pinky up.

  1. So often the friends of spouses (especially a spouse’s best friend) feel that they can’t retain the friendship with the spouse’s partner after a couple separate/divorce. Carmen and Kathy are wonderful exceptions to this and I’m happy for you that they realize the gift that your friendship to them is. Enjoy your visit with them again in May.

    P.S. You made me laugh out loud when you wrote *I personally think she should stop wearing the ears… 🙂

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