I don’t want to turn this into a cat blog but I writes what I lives.

Did anyone ever see the movie “The Bad Seed”?

This beautiful little girl, Patty McCormick, shows the world a sweet, loving, “purring” (if you’ll permit me)  exterior but her inside is quite different. She kills a bunch of people and the story goes on.

When Elvis first came here he eyed the place and decided that this was a good spot to set up shop. But first he’d have to make himself attractive to the old bitch that runs it. Read the entries talking about when he first came. The little bastard knows what he’s doing.

He purred and rubbed himself  against her until she was putty in his claws, I mean , paws (the claws came later).

He even endeared himself to her neighbors and that couldn’t have been easy. Liz was a piece of cake. She misses her cat Puss and was easy game for him but David would have been more difficult.

Maybe to some cats,  but he’s wily. All he had to do was pretend to like him, a new feeling for David, nobody likes David. But a few rubs and purrs and David was toast.

Now that he feels secure his real self is out. He does shit just for spite. He walks past something on a table and he just whacks it off. Why? Because he can.

I’m never drinking a glass of water when he doesn’t walk over, stick his head in, take a few laps and keep walking. Not because he’s thirsty. He’s got bowls of water in two rooms. He just wants me to know that there is nothing in this house that is off limits to him.

He’s even started training me to move at hand signals. He smacks his bag of treats and I immediately take a handful and throw them on the floor ( he likes to gather them)

My hands are so cut up that it’s a good thing I’m not married any more. It would really hurt to wear a wedding ring. I have to admit that’s my fault though. Sometimes in my sleep I move them.

So how did “The Bad Seed” end?

(Spoiler alert) The mother finds out that her daughter is a killer and poisons them both.

Unfortunately the mother dies and the kid lives.

So if in the near future, one of my relatives offers you a sweet orphan cat, one that purrs and purrs (not for nuthin but that purring can really get old) RUN.