I read a very early version of Julie’s book “The Stars In Our Eyes” since I was asked to contribute my knowledge of Reality TV.
NOTE: I am the “go to” person in my family when anyone needs info on dumb TV shows, books or movies.
I was making my morning sissy today and I decided to pick up the book for a fresh read.
I swear on my dog’s life. If you start this book you won’t be able to put it down.
Sure it’s about celebrity but it’s more than that. It’s Julie’s hysterically funny and clever voice.
By the time I got to page 5 I knew I had to keep myself from calling Julie several times and telling her how I loved a turn of phrase or thought she put down.
My morning sissy is at 4:15 a.m. so my call wouldn’t have been welcome.
The other night I gave a party for the release of Julie’s book.
I wanted Julie to be proud so I prepared for it for months.
I had my apartment painted for the first time in 20 years.
I put lights out on my terrace
I got plenty of booze and eats.
I trained my dog to host which was no easy feat since he has no qualms about biting anyone who either touches his stuff or looks shifty. And as you can see he’s absolutely exhausted from the effort.
I even made sure that there was a photographer to memorialize the event. Unfortunately the only thing she chose to memorialize was herself in different lights. This is a picture she just had to have her mother take on Miss Liz’s terrace.
Since I knew how tired Julie would be from her performance with TV’s Steve O’Donnell at Barnes & Noble I even took it upon myself to chat up her guests when they arrived
“I know you’re wondering what kind of special woman would put out an excellent spread like this for people she doesn’t know. Let me tell you a little about her.
She was born in 1944 in a middle (to upper class) family….”
I know that many of them were intrigued with my story since when they had to excuse themselves to say hello to someone it was always someone very important and they promised to catch up with me later.
Luckily I photocopied everyone’s license, you know because liquor was being served, so I can drop in on them in their homes.
They are in for a treat. 1955 was a very “happ’nin’ year for me.
But this isn’t about me. It’s about my sweet niece Julie Klam who went with me to the dentist when I needed a root canal and made me leave when she noted that the dentist had a rotary phone.
Here’s to you my girl.
The time has come, Mattie, for your book now. Today’s post has verified it. It should be a collection of your blog postings, perhaps selectively culled. Simple titled “My Blog.” Subtitled ‘Funny, Angry, Sad, Never Politically Correct Actual Reporting of A Life You Wish Had.’
And please give Ray a kiss for me.