93.You know that song “I gotta be me”? Well I don’t anymore.

I had an epiphany again yesterday.

A friend suggested starting a little business. In my head my immediate reaction was “Don’t be silly. I can’t do that”.

I was wondering why I went there.

One reason is I’ve considered dave and me in the throws of retirement.

Of course I wasn’t actually planning to retire because even with the divorce I’d still be part of the corporation and taking care of the details of his career.

I explain that because his being a free lance worker the only way I’d know what he’s earning is if I handle it.

Now that I’m seeing how he’s handling his money when I’m not in control of it I’m actually worried about him.

I digress.

Back to my epiphany.

Maybe if dave hadn’t dumped me I’d be moving towards retiring but that was my old life.

My new life is starting and I can do whatever I want with it.

I never thought I could write but I’m doing it every day and loving it.

If a business opportunity comes up that interests me, as long as it doesn’t take money I can try it if I want to. And even if it takes money. I may be able to get a loan or a grant or something for being a woman, a senior citizen and a loser.

There’s a whole bunch of things I can try if I want to.

If only I wasn’t so scared.

8 thoughts on “93.You know that song “I gotta be me”? Well I don’t anymore.

  1. love this mattie!!!

    you’ve been sitting on your extraordinary talents for too long. writing, opening a business……whatever
    you decide to do can be great. this little “gift” of “getting dumped” is opening up a world for you.
    I’m already seeing the “book”!!! you go girl!!!!

    and, i’ve always known you to move forward productively despite being scared. so what, be scared!!

  2. Mattie, if you decide to write a book, I promise that I will go to your book signings, and buy at least 10 copies. That is, of course, providing your book signings don’t require an airplane ride. Then again, I’d probably even buy an airline ticket, providing, of course, that you held your book signing in Barbados. I do believe they have book stores in Barbados.

    I can say without hesitation that no matter what you set your mind to, it will be successful.

    Just don’t ask the government for anything. They’re having a bit of a tough time these days.

  3. You are not a loser Mattie, you are a learner. Whenever anything ‘bad’ happens to anyone it is ultimately for the good, if you can learn from it. In essence, once again I agree with Susan. Love you

  4. The only adjective I’d agree with is “woman” the rest is bullshit – oops
    Senior citizen? My father-in-law started a winery at 78- growing it from vines on up- we joked about how his wine might age without him! His wine ain’t great “drinkable” was the quote- but he’s still harvesting grapes at 84.
    You can do anything you want AND you are a gifted writer.
    Love Patty

  5. What’s left to say after all the above but “Get your Butt in Gear and GO!”

    You’ll enjoy yourself and probably surprise yourself too.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s