I was feeling pretty happy today.
I met Julie for lunch and had plans for dinner and to hear a good friend’s husband play in a band tonight.
We got there and I knew a few of the musicians. They came over and kissed me. Some knew about me and dave, some didn’t.
They started to play and I looked at my friend.
She looked the way I must have looked thousands of times.
She was proud and also attracted to her man.
I felt such grief roll over me in a wave.
I surprised myself that the tears welled up in my eyes.
I knew that not only would I never watch dave play again but I would never be that person in the audience again. The one feeling proud and lucky. Sitting at the special table near the bandstand, knowing that he would look at me with a question in his eyes to see how the band sounded.
And suddenly I realized that those special faces he makes while he plays would now be familiar to that stranger.