236.I go to the dentist to have my head examined

I’m much better today.

I went to the dentist yesterday. If it weren’t for them always wanting to look at my teeth I wouldn’t mind going there at all.

As you know I double love Jody, the woman who cleans my teeth.

It wasn’t like our usual meeting though. Generally she is kind and encouraging. Yesterday she was forced to yell at me. I was in a lousy mood and I told her pretty much what I wrote yesterday in my blog about feeling like I’ll never be free of dave because I’m still the one with all the knowledge about our stuff, money and otherwise.

Frankly I expected an “Oh you poor thing” from her but that isn’t what I got.

She said she’s starting to get mad at me because I should think more of myself. She asked if I’m trying to hold on to part of dave by taking care of him. She said it’s up to me to set the boundaries and stick to them.

When I got home I really gave that some thought. I think I would be glad if I never heard from dave again but when I do and he needs help I respond the way I always have.

But Jody did make an impression on me. I emailed dave and told him to go to the Citibank in Japan, do as much as he can himself and let me know what information he needs after he does his part.

Baby steps.

Also yesterday since I was feeling very fragile I once again wouldn’t let my sweet dentist take a full set of X-rays. He’s been trying to do this for the past year and my explanation for not doing it, that I don’t want to know if there’s anything bad in there just doesn’t make sense to him.

He tried his usual nonsensical statement of “Wouldn’t you want to know so we can fix it before it gets too bad?” but that didn’t work so he brought out the big guns.

“One of the ways to find tumors in your gums is through X-rays “.

That’s all I hadda hear. You say “tumor” I say “adios”

He did give me my usual kiss on the lips though so l was able to leave happy and still  relatively ignorant about whatever is going on in my mouth.

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