I love my new guest room.

For the most part I love everyone who comes to visit me. I like the women better than the men. Here’s why.

Men feel a need to tell you what you should do to improve your life, mechanically.

I have heard “The faucet in your guest bathroom has a drip ” from every man over 40 who’s been here. Did they fix it?  No.

Even the ones who offer to fix it want me to be part of the solution.

“Do you have a wrench?”

Say I say “Yes, I have a wrench”.

That means I have to get up, look for a wrench and bring it to them.

AND it’s never just a wrench. “Do you have a weezle?”

I never have the right size weezle so that means a trip to Home Depot which though it’s across the street still means I have to wear something other than my pajamas and either drag Rupert with me or upset him by telling him I’m going out.

Then after one trip to get the weezle I have to go back again to get the snark that the weezle needs in order to work efficiently.

Then I have to stand there and hand him things and applaud because they’re fixing something I never gave a shit about to begin with.

So I have learned. The answer to “Do you have a wrench?” is always “No”.