381. “And now, the rest of the story.”

I received a call from my lawyer yesterday saying she had good news for me. I was legally divorced.

She seemed surprised that I didn’t greet this news happily.

The truth is I have no idea how I feel.

I know I don’t feel happy. I think I don’t feel sad. If I were to examine my innermost thoughts, something that this blog forces me to do almost daily, all I feel is shock.

I emailed dave yesterday, at my lawyer’s request, telling him that we are officially divorced and asking for his address in Japan so she can send him the papers.

His answer, “As I expected, I don’t know what to say. I will have my ring cut off tomorrow.” Then he wrote his address.

381

Actually, I was surprised that he was still wearing it.

I think he’s going to find what I discovered when I stopped wearing my wedding rings a year ago, that when he cuts that ring off, the indentations from wearing those rings during 38 years of marriage don’t disappear.

Mine are still there.

I just read that over and said to myself, “What the fuck does that mean? That I still have dents in my finger? Big fuckin’ deal. Let him wear a band aid”

Sometimes I get carried away with the drama.

6 thoughts on “381. “And now, the rest of the story.”

  1. My prayers are that you feel free, independent, and excited about your new life. I send {Hugs} for the insecure little girl I know is still inside you.

    Maybe the indention will be too much for him and he will have the finger cut off too 🙂

  2. I have been racing through your blog, and the pressure has really been on the last couple of days to finish so that I can finally comment. You are at a MILESTONE! It’s final. The conclusion of the process you started way back in August 2011. I don’t know you, but I am so very. very. very proud of you. Thank you for sharing your story. I can’t wait to see how lovely your everyday life without a “looming final day” plays out through your words. Much love, Terri

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