Yesterday I did a good deed and as they say all good deeds yadda yadda yadda
My niece Stephanie was going on an overnight bike ride. Her friend Donna was staying at her house and minding the animals. But Donna was not leaving work until 4 so she wouldn’t be at Steph’s house until 4:45.
Steph asked me to be at her house early in the morning. Not to feed the dogs, no, but to keep them company.
Here is why I am a saint. I live an hour and a half from Steph but did I say okay? Yes I did. Not only because I love Stephanie beyond belief but because I too am crazy and would want someone to keep Ray company when I am away (Hi Dan and Scott).
So I get there at 10 something and Steph and Terry hadn’t even left. I spend the day with the dogs while watching Ray pretend that Steph’s d0gs aren’t there.
I don’t really blame him since the last time we stayed there they treated him with no respect at all.
Steph said I only had to stay until 2. I stayed until 3 after giving her dogs lunch. The lunch was a roast chicken that was in the refrigerator. I only gave them a little because it was after all, only lunch.
On my way home Donna called and asked if I had fed the dogs. I said I only gave them a little of the chicken that was in the refrigerator so she could feed them more.
I know this seems boring and it would be EXCEPT…… I got accused.
I just got a call from Stephanie.
“What did you do with the chicken?”
“I put it back in the icebox”.
“Donna says it wasn’t there She had to buy another chicken”
“That’s crazy” but then I started thinking…. I forget a lot of stuff now.
BUT I KNOW I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING WITH THE CHICKEN.
Let me leave it to you people to figure this out. Here are the clues.
- I did give the dogs some chicken.
- I remember putting the top back on the chicken and putting it in the refrigerator.
- My conclusion: The worst I could have done is to leave the chicken on the counter. Stephanie claims she looked in the freezer and in the microwave and in the garbage and in all the drawers because she knows I’m dotty.
- The only thing I can imagine is that Donna is a fucking jew hating liar who is framing me so my family puts me in a home and gets a power of attorney to take my money and kill me.
Thank you for your patience.