I went for my annual check up yesterday. I mostly told her the truth. Some of it wasn’t her business. What does she care how much I drink?

I usually have a drink and a half almost every night talking to David on the phone but I told Miss Buttinsky that I have one drink 2 times a week.

If she can’t cure me with that information than she has no right to call herself a doctor.

Interestingly I had cocktails with David in the flesh last night. He is in New York on business. I believe his business has something to do with raising the oil prices so good Americans can’t travel more that one  mile away from their homes without taking out a second mortgage.

He admitted that he won’t vote for Trump any more but he will vote for Cruz who is the devil that Trump claims to be.

David’s reasoning is that since no one in Washington likes Cruz he won’t be able to get anything done if he’s in office. He’s shell shocked from all the harm he believes President  Obama did.

This makes no sense at all because  he should want a kindred spirit (i.e. the devil) to be successful and do as much harm as he can.

My friend Ernie says he will vote for Trump and Ernie is a good and kind person so I can’t figure that out.

I was talking to him the other day and he reminded me of something else we did to make each  other laugh.

We went to the Strand Bookstore, a huge place, and walked past each other carrying books that we’d never read.

He chose “Our Changing Coastlines” while I carried “Breeding habits of fur bearing mammals of North America”.

Now some of you smart people won’t get that joke because they might actually think those are possibilities in the “sit down with a good book” category but we thought it was an absolute scream.

I sure miss those days.

The only yucks I get lately is when I watch that insurance add where the two weight lifters keep calling each  other “bro”