933. David says any blog without him in it is dull

David has been putting pressure on me to write about him. He insists that you people are bored to death with reading about my dog and my family.

He tells me that the only interesting entries to my blog are about him.

I keep saying that when he does something interesting I’ll write about it.

It’s not as though I don’t know everything he’s doing. I speak to him at least 5 times a week and he tells me every bit of information that he has about his life now.

It’s all about tall hot blondes that are dying to get into his pants.

I’ve seen pictures of some of them and they really are good looking. They have great jobs and are educated.

I heard him speaking to one of them on the phone and she was all lovey dovey. I even spoke to her for a minute. You could see she was trying to ingratiate herself with me because she knew he and I were close.

All I can take out of that is that women over 40 are screwed.

David is not a bad looking man. He’s nowhere near as good looking as he thinks he is but he isn’t bad looking.

But these women are smokin’.

When they were younger they wouldn’t have pissed on a guy like him.

I mean they were and are still on Brad Pitt’s level. But Father Time has replaced Brad Pitt with David.

So you ladies who think your husbands are boring and dumb, before you give them the boot, think twice.

I’m not saying that life won’t be better with them gone, because in most cases it will, but know this.

Angelina Jolie is out there waiting to laugh at their jokes and marvel at their insights.

And if you want to replace them recognize that you’re going to have to accept Angie’s leftovers.

Okay David, I”m sure that it wasn’t what you had in mind but I wrote about you.

Now folks, wouldn’t you rather have read about this guy?

sleeping car

 

11 thoughts on “933. David says any blog without him in it is dull

  1. Raymond is much more interesting and loving. Boring is someone who has nothing but sadness and anger and adds nothing Hamish to life.

  2. My comment isn’t about David…I’ve been reading Julie’s book, “Please Excuse My Daughter” and it’s a good book. But having read your blogs, it makes the events more interesting since I’ve read your perspective as well.

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