257. Sometimes I’m so smart I just want to kiss myself.

Well Rupe and Liz have gone back to Santa Fe.

I miss them already.

I will see them soon though. In exactly one week from yesterday I’m going to Santa Fe for the weekend on American Airlines, airline to the stars who no longer have careers and don’t care that much if their plane doesn’t make it because the up side of a plane crash is that at least they’ll get in the news again. Does that make me sound negative? I hope not.

Starting today I will be planning my wardrobe. I don’t know, should I pack the black? Or mix it up a bit with the black?

I’m doing a few firsts.

1. I’m flying alone.

I really feel sorry for whoever sits next to me. I’m a nervous flyer, hell, I’m a nervous liver and when I get nervous I babble and say all kinds of crazy stuff. I’m constantly leaving people with odd looks on their faces.

2. I’m changing planes.

This kind of annoys me. I could see if I was going to someplace rare like Illinois but I’m going to fly into Albuquerque. Isn’t that a  big place that a lot of people go to? Why can’t there be a direct flight from New York? New Yorkers travel everywhere (not me but the others) Shouldn’t all flights from New York be direct? I’m just saying.

3. I’m going to a land I’ve never been to before.

Even though I just told you that Albuquerque is an important place.  It isn’t my final destination, and I’ve never been there anyway.  I’m going to Santa Fe. This is a place I’ve only seen on TV. What language will they be speaking? I only speak Bronx, will they understand me?  Will I be attacked by a rattler? So much to prepare for.

I think you can carry guns there.  I know David has some guns under his and Liz’s bed. Since he’s leaving town before I do I don’t think he’ll mind if I  just take one of  his guns and pack it in my suitcase. I won’t bring it in my carry on. That would be just asking for trouble. Although “Trouble” is my middle name, along with “Truth” and “Joan”

Liz told me that breathing may be difficult there because the air is thin or something. I wasn’t really listening. That won’t be a problem for me though because I’ll just wear my sleep machine the whole time I’m there.  Note to self: Bring backpack for the motor and some kind of small generator.

Ah what am I worried about? I got this thing aced.

7 thoughts on “257. Sometimes I’m so smart I just want to kiss myself.

  1. First, the hard breathing due to altitude, if the plane crashes it won’t matter (I know, I’m always helpful), but assuming it makes it thru you could train for the altitude by running up the stairs of the Empire State Building daily before the flight. You’ll sleep like a baby in New Mexico. By the way, babies sleep for two hours, wake up crying, wet the bed, get fed, and go back to sleep for another two hours.

    Second, taking a gun with you. Don’t bother there are loads of boutique gun shops in Santa Fe and you can pick up a nice pearl (or better yet Turquoise) handled 45 caliber snake killing number with no problems.

    Third and most importantly, pack the black, you can buy loads of Turquoise and silver jewelry to liven up your wardrobe and heck what goes better with Turquoise than black?

    Have a wonderful trip 🙂

  2. Mattie,
    Have a wonderful time. Just make sure that the seats are securely attached to the floor of the plane. On the positive side, if they’re not, you might end up in First Class.

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